By Patti Hathaway, CSP
Whether you are in customer service, sales, management,
a professional position or in a support role, you are making an impression
on those around you. Is it the impression you want?
How long do you think you have before someone makes
a judgment about you? In her book The Four-Minute Sell, Janet Elsea
says you have just 7 to 15 seconds to make a good first impression. You
have about four minutes total for someone to decide if he or she wants
to go beyond that first four minutes (therein lies the four-minute sell).
Let’s talk about some of the ways to create positive
impressions every time. I'm going to use the acronym CONTACT to
describe some guidelines for building effective rapport with others and
presenting yourself professionally.
Confidence
It is critical to project self-confidence through your handshake, eye
contact and willingness to risk extending yourself first. One of the most
powerful things you can do to make a confident and powerful first impression
(particularly for women) is to initiate a handshake. The handshake is
a common societal expectation for men and is never questioned. In fact,
social etiquette experts still advocate that men should wait for a woman
to extend her hand first for a handshake. Notice, I said social etiquette.
In business, it doesn't matter whether you are meeting a man or woman
for the first time,you should always initiate a handshake, regardless
of your gender, because it shows your confidence.
Outer Appearance
Dress in a manner that is appropriate for the situation. Look at what
other respected people in your organization wear, and dress similarly.
The conservative approach is usually best. Quality is more important than
quantity when it comes to clothes. You may want to visit a tailor to ensure
your clothes fit well. Remember, attention to details can make all the
difference in your business presence.
Names
Learn and use people’s names when you meet them. A good tip is to repeat
the person’s name three times during your initial conversation with them.
Another technique is to ask a question about their name. Such as "Patti,
do you spell your name with a 'y' or an 'i'?" Some memory experts
suggest using associations, such as associating a person’s name with another
object to help you remember it. Most of the time this is quite effective,
but even the best techniques can backfire. Bev was an interior designer
who prided herself on her relationships with her clients and her ability
to recall names of past clients using associations with animals. She had
used the association technique successfully for some time when she made
the following embarrassing mistake. One of her past clients was a rather
large, yet stately woman named Mrs. Shepherd. Bev had not done any work
for Mrs. Shepherd for over a year when she happened to see her one day.
Bev went up to the woman, shook her hand and said, "Mrs. Husky, it’s
wonderful to see you again!"
Finally, if you forget a person’s name, don't be embarrassed
to ask his or her name again. It happens to the best of us.
Talk
Speak to communicate, not to impress. Pay attention to your tone, inflection
and pitch; make sure it’s upbeat and positive. One of the most important
ways to create a powerful first impression is to get the people to talk
about themselves and their interests. By becoming sincerely interested
in others, you'll build rapport and be remembered.
Depending on the situation, think in advance about the
types of questions you would like to ask. Here are some sample questions
you might want to consider asking when networking with customers, peers
and managers:
- How did you get started in the business?
- What do you enjoy most about your position/career?
- What separates your organization (or you) from the competition?
- What one thing would you do in your career if you knew you couldn't
fail?
- What has been your greatest career challenge?
- What advice would you give to someone new in the field?
Acceptance
Suspend judgment and withhold assumptions. Make the other person feel
as if he or she is the most important person you will meet today. Along
with acceptance, look for ways to show the following:
- Consideration
Strive to have others feel better after they interact with you.
- Trust
Truly listen to the other person. Show that what they say is important
to you. Try this technique, known as "mirroring." First, match
the other person’s voice tone or tempo. If they talk fast, you talk
fast. If they talk slowly, you talk slowly. Also match the other person’s
body movements, posture and gestures. If the person you're mirroring
crosses his/her legs, you cross your legs. If the other person gestures,
you gesture. Of course, subtlety is everything. You may want to wait
several seconds before moving. A very important point about gesturing
is that we only gesture when we speak. This won't make much sense to
you until you go out and observe other people speaking to each other.
But trust me, this is important to keep in mind.
Susan Bixler, author of the book, The Professional
Image, summarized it well when she said, "Although people should
be judged by their innate worth, it is often a first impression that determines
whether someone will stick around long enough to let them reveal it."
You may want to consider these AMA seminars to learn
more about effective professional communication:
Author Bio: Patti Hathaway, Certified Speaking
Professional and Author, is known as "The Change Agent." She
helps people change their perspective by providing customized keynotes
and training. To receive her complimentary e-mail newsletter, go to her
Website www.changeagent.com
or call 1-800-339-0973.
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